Do you know someone who constantly gives, seemingly with no thought of themselves? They come through for the needy, look out for their fellow humans, and pride themselves on helping out, whether it’s money, time or caring? You may even recognize yourself. Women, especially, are taught to be caregivers, and to sacrifice their own needs for the comfort of everyone around them.
Helping out our fellow humans is part of the beautiful cooperation that serves the evolution of life itself, and life flourishes when there’s a balance of give and take.
Like the inhale and exhale of our breath, healthy abundance is created when there’s a flow of both giving and receiving.
If we only give, without also receiving, we’re starving the very life force of abundance.
We’ve been taught to take pride in independence from the time we’re born, to chase that cultural paradigm of success. The goal is to never experience lack, to constantly strive to have enough, and to do anything we can to circumvent the shame of asking for help.
The problem with that is we aren’t meant to always stand alone. In our best moments, human beings are a cooperative species.
For some, it’s actually painful to be seen, even by themselves, as anything less than a perfectly functioning human being.
If we’re always giving, yet insist on struggling on alone with our own burdens, we’re denying our very humanness. Disowning this part of our humanity deprives us of the vulnerable and intimate act of allowing ourselves to be truly known, needs and all.
The universe loves and supports us through what is right in front of us.
If we’re refusing offers of help, tolerating a situation that could be improved by asking for support, or have an inability to graciously receive financial, physical or emotional generosity, we’re telling the universe to back off, and blocking the flow of abundance into our life.
When we do that, we’re not just rejecting help from our fellow humans, we’re outright saying no to the abundance that flows to us through our everyday experiences.
I’ve been in that lonely place. I was fiercely independent and abhorred asking for help.
Then I became ill. I found myself unable to work, bank account empty, and struggling to physically function. My independent identity collapsed, and I was forced to learn how to ask for help.
Not knowing how I was going to meet basic needs, I made a conscious decision to trust that the universe would have my back, and to practice gracious and grateful receiving.
The Universe Will Find the Easiest Path to Reach Us With Abundance.
I noticed that whenever I had a need, whether physical, financial or emotional, it was often met through unexpected support from my fellow humans. No matter how big or small the gesture, I celebrated it as a miracle!
It’s still a learning process, but that practice of grateful receiving changed my life.
By receiving joyously, we invite abundance.
If you recognize yourself as a compulsive giver, watch your energy the next time you’re in a position to receive.
Can you receive with the same positive energy in which you give? If you feel resentment or shame rising, try shifting your focus to the expansive energy of gratitude.
Asking for help and receiving graciously takes strength and a sureness of soul.
Being attached to the story of being a giver makes it almost impossible to receive unconditionally, without feeling obligated to give back. Try to graciously receive unconditional support as a gift from the universe!
If you’re used to being the giver, it can feel upsetting to be in a place of need. It’s easy to think that we have nothing left to give, (never true) or we should be able to do more, (also not true). By telling stories of lack, we end up creating more lack in our life.
Abundance is an energy state, independent of the illusion of physical reality.
Make if a habit to savor the feeling of receiving. Receive with joy everything that delights your senses, the beauty of a sunset, the aroma of your favorite flower, the hugs of a loved one. When something shows up for us, remember to receive it with mindful thankfulness.
If you find yourself in need, practice knowing that your needs are met. This is a state of faith, of knowing without knowing how. Stay in thankfulness, and be ready to receive. No worry. No grasping. Relax.
When you receive, feel joy in the way the universe has creatively met your need. Express thanks.
Be surprised, be excited, be joyful. Be like the child that takes pleasure in receiving the littlest things, without judgment. This is the energy of abundance.
Ask, receive, and accept, with joy and gratefulness!