Feel the Fear, Then What? Also, Your Promised Update!

So THIS happened!!!!!!!


I’ve manifested my vehicle!


I’ve finally Got My Wheels!!!!! GreenBabyUnicornstwo

But not before a BIG FAT DOSE of fear got ahold of me!

I made a public announcement in a previous newsletter to you that I’d set the intention to manifest a miracle. I wrote about it here, in Manifesting a Miracle – Six Steps To Manifesting Your Dreams, with a promise to keep you updated.


Getting back on the road is a big deal for a few reasons, including chronic illness that affected my ability to drive, and a divorce that took out my credit. (It’s true that women are often financially worse off after a divorce.)


Even though I knew I was ready, and was practicing the manifestation principles that I wrote about, the morning before I signed the final paperwork, I woke up at five-o’clock-anxiety-AM, flooded with worry. In those wee hours I worked and re-worked budgets, considered and reconsidered my options, and freaked the out. 


Those were some really hairy moments. I’d finally found the perfect vehicle…THE ONE…but fear threatened to short-circuit the whole process. I even contemplated staying car-less.0001Fi


I allowed my logical brain to keep trying to work out a rational decision, but I refused to give into fear. I pulled out my bag of tricks and worked to get out of its grip.


For two hours I focused on calm, deep breathing, consciously repeating reassuring statements to myself like this: “May you be safe. May you be well. May you live in joy and peace. All is well.”  (Find more information about this powerful practice in Martha Beck’s new book, Diana Herself: An Allegory of Awakening.) The fear came in waves, but each time I was able to calm my primitive fear brain, it allowed me to tap into my internal guidance system and higher wisdom.

Without fear to confuse me, the decision to make that vehicle mine felt clear, calm, and expansive in my body. 


Every one of us has this internal guidance system. How many times have you or someone else you know said something like, “I had a gut feeling? I just KNEW it?” Or, “I should have listened to that inner voice!” Our innate wisdom is unfailing, but it can also be subtle. How many times do we second guess those quiet little messages!


The decision made absolutely NO SENSE. I could have chosen a smaller vehicle with better gas mileage and a lower car payment, but this wonderful, magical, vehicle was like a magnet, PULLING me to have it in my life.


Following our dreams sometimes looks crazy, but sometimes crazy is right and sensible is the illusion. I knew in my heart, gut, and soul that I was going in the right direction. 


When I was overwhelmed with fear, I just wanted someone to tell me what to do, but none of us has a crystal ball. Not one that tells the future anyway. In the end, we just have to have to know there are no right or wrong decisions, it’s all experience for us and our growth.


Anytime we have a major decision to make…”should I stay or should I go, is this job right for me, should I take this risk”…REMEMBER THAT FEAR IS A TERRIBLE ADVISOR. baby-443388_1280


Fear is noisy and distracting and doesn’t care about our dreams. It only wants to maintain the status quo and keep us from danger.


Fear doesn’t mean you’re going the wrong way.


When you’re in fear, take deep breaths and quiet your mind until it lets go. Don’t make a decision based on fear.


Follow what pulls you like a magnet. Stay with the magic of what lights you up inside.


Have the courage to take the leap, even when it looks totally crazy.


What if we lived our whole lives like this? Just imagine what we could do!


If you’re confused or stuck, I can help you tune into your own internal guidance system.


I’m an affordable life coach for women. Contact me here.




  1. Mary Ellen,
    What a wonderful article on fear! I am just finally, finally letting go of fear ruling my life, it’s taken a long time for sure. You’re’ so right, we can’t foresee the future, it is all experience, I like looking at decisions that way, that’s a very opening thought. Glad you got your wheels!

    • Thanks Heidi! It’s a practice, that’s for sure. We’re undoing conditioning, and sometimes trauma, that started in childhood, and that takes some unwinding. Add to that the fear in our media every day and it can be a challenge! Kudos to you, it takes courage to face fear, and I know you’ve faced some of the deepest stuff! xo

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